I have a confession to make.
I have a really hard time asking for help.
When I was a new Mom and even as an old Mom, it was/is hard for me to admit that I didn’t always know how to handle a problem with my kids.
Our culture makes us believe that parenting is easy. Breastfeeding is natural. If your baby/kid has a problem, it’s because you are doing something wrong. I took that to heart! I believed that if I needed to ask for help it meant I was a failure. I am a reasonably well educated and intelligent woman. I should be able to figure it out. If I couldn’t, it reflected on my abilities and on my intellect.
I began to learn with my second child how wrong this attitude was. We tried everything to discover why this kid couldn’t latch on me or on a bottle. I asked and asked and asked for help because I knew that I could breastfeed as I had done so with my first child. How horrible it would have been if this kid had been my first. I would have 100% believed that ‘I just couldn’t breastfeed’. Face to face interactions helped me the most. Having another Mom hug me, let me know that she understood how hard it was and make a suggestion or not. Online “support” just didn’t cut it. Real Moms and families and professionals did.
Why am I telling you this?
I want you to understand that we all need help sometimes. From breastfeeding, diapering, crying, solid foods, teething, and potty learning too . . . everything about raising these wonderful little people is a learning curve. You/we don’t need to do it alone! It is not a poor reflection on you when you ask for help.
So who do you ask?
Other Moms (over coffee, at a group, face to face)
La Leche League
Weight Check Wednesday
Online groups if they are about the specific topic you are asking or if they are groups that support your way of parenting. (Asking in a large group about specific parenting questions unfortunately opens you up for a lot of unhelpful and usually not very nice answers)
Who shouldn’t you ask?
Google. It’s the fastest way to freak yourself out ever! Your normal cluster feeding baby turns into a weird alien creature quick on Google.
How often should you ask?
Ask as many times as it takes for you to get the help that you specifically need. If something doesn’t work, that doesn’t mean that you did something wrong. It means that you haven’t found the correct answer yet that works for your little person, for you, or for your family. Keep asking! Keep seeking until you find what’s correct for you.
Asking for help makes you strong!
Asking for help makes you smarter and more willing to do what is correct for your family!
Asking for help is a good thing. A hard thing sometimes, but it will build strength and resilience.
If you are needing help with breastfeeding here are some resources.
BFANWI Breastfeeding Support Resources List
ALL La Leche League of WI: www.LLLofWI.org
Appleton Ascension OB/GYN Madison Center clinic: 920-730-4413
Lisa Urbaniak RN, IBCLC
Appleton City of Appleton Health Department: 920-832-6429
Jessica Moyle RN, IBCLC
Appleton Primary Care Associates: 920-996-1000 (clients only)
Dr. Jessica Johnston-Rickert, MD; Jennifer Wentzel LPN;
Jennifer Bruss LPN, CLC; Deann Conrad LPN
Appleton St. Elizabeth Hospital: 920-738-2734
firstname.lastname@example.org Mary Fochs RN IBCLC, Debra Waters RN, IBCLC, Paula Dinse RN, IBCLC, Cindy Gresl RN CLC, and Meghan Gremban CLC
Appleton ThedaCare Regional Medical Center - Appleton
Family Birth Care: 920-738-6253 Marty Polzin LPN, IBCLC
Appleton ThedaCare Pediatrics- Appleton: 920-729-2154
Amy Huss RN, CLC
Appleton Mother Wisdom Lactation Services: 920-279-0031
Maggie Payne CLS, Private Practice: see FB
Appleton Women's Health Specialists: 920-749-4000
Molly O'Neill RN, BSN, IBCLC
Appleton Anja Farin LM, CPM, IBCLC: 920-659-0267
Private Practice: office in Appleton
Berlin ThedaCare Medical Center - Berlin: 920-361-5521
Mary Soda CLC, Stephanie Nowak CLC
Calumet Calumet County Public Health: 920-849-1610 County Amber Bastian RN, CLC
Calumet Calumet County WIC : 920-849-1420 County Barb Schaefer CBE, CLC; Emily Berg, BFPC, CLC
Fond du Lac Fond du Lac County Health Department: 920-929-3085 County Amanda Cassidy RN, CLC; Laura Berndt RN, CLC, Krystal Sisel, RN, CLC
Fond du Lac Fond du Lac County WIC: 920-929-3104 (WIC clients only) Thurs& Mon County Marla Hemauer RD, CD, CLC; Kara Kerrigan RD, CD, CLC;
Sarah Depies DTR, CLC; Kimberly Schnabel DTR, CLC
Fond du Lac Agnesian Healthcare: 920-926-4837
Jodi Demaa RNC, MSN, IBCLC; Rita Parker RN, BSN, IBCLC, Pam Mand BSN, RN, IBCLC, Rebecca Merkel RN, IBCLC, Desiree Frank BSN, RN, IBCLC, Erin Sippel BSN, RN, IBCLC
Green Lake Green Lake Public Health Department: 920-294-4070 County Kari Schneider RN, BSN, CLS
Green Lake Green Lake County WIC: 920-787-5514 (WIC clients only) County Erika Martin WIC BFPC
Marquette County Marquette County WIC: 920-787-5514 x218(WIC clients only) County Jamie Thibodeaux MS, RD, CLS
Menasha Parent Connection - Menasha Office: 920-739-4226
Jill Meiers CLC
Neenah Children's Hospital of Wisconsin y n n n n n
Neenah ThedaCare Pediatrics- Neenah: 920-729-2154
Amber Otto RN, CLC
Neenah ThedaCare Regnional Medical Center - Neenah
Family Birth Care: 920-729-2225 Jill Nettekoven RN, IBCLC
Neenah Women's Care of Wisconsin: 920-729-7105
Kristy Hagar, RN IBCLC
New London ThedaCare Medical Center - New London: 920-531-2214
Donna Hoewisch RN, IBCLC
New London ThedaCare Physicians - New London: 920-531-2400
Donna Hoewisch RN, IBCLC
Oshkosh Aurora Hospital: (920) 456-7364
Rachel Juckem RN, IBCLC
Oshkosh Mercy Medical Center: 920-223-1214
Oshkosh Parent Connection-Oshkosh Office: 920-233-6630
Ashley Weselenak CLC, Amy Gard CLC
Outagamie Outagamie County Public Health: 920-832-5100 County Cindy Brylski-Breit RN, IBCLC
Outagamie Outagamie County WIC: 920-832-5109 (WIC clients only) County Judy Oppelt, IBCLC, Rachael Young BFPC
updated June 2019
Shawano Shawano Medical Center: 715-526-7180
Mary Alexander BSN, IBCLC & Christina Hubbard LPN, IBCLC
Waupaca County SAM's Lactation Consulting, LLC 920-249-5086
Samantha Metko RDN, IBCLC Private Practice Serving Waupaca County and the Fox Cities: see FB
Waupaca ThedaCare Medical Center - Waupaca: 715-258-1078 1st & 3rd
Thurs.'s y Kalli Donaldson, RN CLC (Monday's); Erin Spencer RN, CLC (Wednesday and Friday PRN)
Waupaca ThedaCare Physicians - Waupaca: 715-256-3000
Patti Peterson RN, IBCLC
Waupaca Waupaca County WIC: 715-258-6391 (WIC clients only) County Kristina Ingrouille MS, RDN, CD, CLC, Sarah Delfosse CLC
Waupun Waupun Memorial Hospital: 920-324-6527
Jodi DeMaa, RNC, MSN, IBCLC
Waushara Waushara County WIC: 920-787-5514 (WIC clients only) County Erika Martin WIC BFPC
Winnebago Winnebago County Public Health (Oshkosh) County 920-232-3000
Belinda DeGoey RN, BSN, CLC, Allison Laverty Montag IBCLC
Winnebago Winnebago County WIC County Neenah: 920-729-2945 Oshkosh: 920-232-3350
Barb Sheldon RD, CD, CLC, Allison Laverty Montag IBCLC BFPC & Billie Verbruggen CD, IBCLC
updated June 2019